Learning the Father's Love
My little boy is quickly approaching the ever-so-exciting age of a whopping year and a half old. As I look back over this precious time, I cannot help but to notice the tremendous change that has occurred in my little guy, but also in myself. As he grows and learns, I follow suit and do the same.
There have been many victories, and perhaps many more failures. I've come to learn more about the man I long to be (for my son and my wife), and even more light is shed on the man that I tend to be. I am consistently reminded of my sinful nature as I repeatedly digress into my prideful ways, and I am all the more reminded of the love the Heavenly Father truly has for me, a broken and battered son.
These past 18 months have laid bare my character defaults, my flaws, my strengths, and my gifts. The Lord reminds me through my son that I, too, need the Father's love. Among the many things I have come to learn through the schooling of fatherhood, one particular realization is that the love that I possess for my little boy is far more intense than I ever could have anticipated it to be. I find that when I reflect on the relationship that I have with my son, I am unable to fully articulate this truly unique love that I have for him.
Any father ought to acclaim that the love he has for his children is on a plane that does not have an equal; yes, different than spousal love and different than that of a friend, or even a brotherly love. It is not necessarily a greater love than the others, but in a way that cannot be compared to other kinds of love. It really is inexplicable as a father how tenderly I love and look upon my son.
Whenever he gazes up at me, I am reluctant to look away, and instead, I admire and adore this beautiful gift that God has given me. God has entrusted me to guard and protect, to love and to cherish, and to lay the foundation for this pure little soul to get back to where he really belongs: in the arms of our loving and ever merciful Father in Heaven.
There are many opportunities for us men as fathers to reflect on this grace of fatherhood. One such theme I continue to come back to is the immense and inexplicable love I have for my son. There are (many) times when my son may not do as I would like him to, and he is beginning to cognitively grasp the concept of fraternal disappointment (although I am admittedly a little too stern for a wee-one of his age). It is in these scenarios that I reflect on the love of God for us.
The grace of fatherhood has, in many ways, brought me to a better (albeit imperfect) comprehension of the love of God. If I cannot even do justice in attempting to articulate the love I have for my own son, how much more does the Lord love me? This is no segue or plug to talk about our brokenness and our undeserving nature to receive God's love; rather, it illuminates, for myself at least, that through my own vocation of being a father, I begin to understand just how grand the love of the Father really is.
It's just that: the love of our Father. A fatherly love, on display properly and fully by God, is the most perfect model of love. It is of His very nature to be love. The very essence of His subsitence is love, which makes possible our own existence. We get to, in a very imperfect way, participate in that fatherly love as men for our own children that God has entrusted to us.
The next time you get a chance to stare into your child's eyes as they gaze back up to you, think that perhaps, our Heavenly Father is gazing at you with a love more pure and tender than you have for that child; a love that neither you nor I can begin to comprehend. Let the grace of being a father to our own children open the depths of our hearts to the most perfect love, love Himself.
